Caroline Olde, who visited the Post Office to pay a gas bill at 9am sharp over 10 years ago, has been pushed out of the way by an estimated 20,000 younger customers and never proceeded beyond the mid-way waiting point, surviving solely on breadcrumbs and scraps of paper, she told an indifferent audience.
“They’ve taken advantage of my frail body,” she sobbed. “It’s disgraceful. I have no idea what happened to my family.”
Her husband, who has now remarried, refused to comment. Post Office executives, when questioned about the old lady’s plight and her perpetual presence on the premises, claimed that they “simply hadn’t noticed her”.
An artists impression of how Mrs Olde may look when she finally receives service well into the next decade.
“We aim to have Mrs Olde served and on her way by 2015,” said a lone fat man stretched into a beard snood.
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