Wednesday, April 7, 2010

festive racism gets UK release

Controversy buggered the film world this weekend with the widespread release of legendary British director Percival Smallcock’s latest movie, “WHITE! Christmas”, described by Warner Brothers as “this spring’s must-see racist Christmas-based drama”.

The film, set in the Southern states of America in the weeks building up to Christmas and featuring almost no plot, sees growing unemployment, economic uncertainty and the recent election of President Barack Obama lead to a massive influx of racial tension. This culminates in a virulent rejuvenation of the Ku Klux Klan, who are attempting to purify the state of non-white inhabitants before the Christmas festival by means increasingly unpleasant. It contains several musical set pieces, all written and choreographed by Celine Dion.



Universally criticised, the film is one of many in a long late-period that has seen Smallcock dubbed “Britain’s worst director”.

Appearing on radio show Filmglans, Smallcock expressed little desire to talk about the film. “I would say that there is very little point to this film,” he wittered gravely. “It is a film largely without merit or worth of any kind, be it artistic or entertaining.”

The film has garnered huge criticism for casting a white actor as the black protagonist. Without makeup, the actor is said to ‘emphasize’ his race by use of what Smallcock describes as a “classic black American accent” and by “engaging in the common pursuits associated with the black class. Dancing and singing, casual drug use and so on.”

Smallcock vehemently dismisses accusations of racism, despite the inclusion of over two hundred highly graphic racially-motivated murders within the film, and the Klansmen’s musical finale, where the percussion is derived solely from the amplified sound of burning bodies and in which many critics have argued that Smallcock attempts to humanise the KKK, portraying them as a sort of troupe of light-hearted dancing pop balladeers, or something like the Osmond’s.

“It is a nauseatingly memorable scene,” blurted film writer Samuel Perthe, “Smallcock at his dreadful worst, where any boundary between a supposed thoughtful portrayal of racism and actual racism has been long-shattered. Smallcock has so little to say about the issues he raises that he might as well speak backwards, effectively swallowing his own words.”

Despite having no concern for the films ideology, Smallcock was himself critical of its aesthetic value. “I admit the film looks awful,” he said. “Shot for shot, it looks awful. The tracking shots: awful. The close ups: awful. The steadicam work is really awful.”

Smallcock is currently working on his own five volume autobiography, “Life with Smallcock”, but has said that he will return to film in 2012, for a specially commissioned Olympic movie called “Tossing Off”, based on an original script about the variety of international homosexual intercourse occurring within the perimeter of the discus throw landing zone.

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